I thought I would be so less busy since the kids are back in school but that is not entirely true. I definitely get time to breath during the day which is nice.
We are still doing pretty well at schedule and routine. I told my kids the other day that they we are having Charlene come in and organize us and give them jobs. Just like the nanny did. When I did that, they all started shmoozing me and saying I am the best mom, and that they wouldn’t change a thing about me. Yep I fell for it for a lil while.
Kaylee had a nightmare last night. Then she said to me,” I am so nightmares always have a happy ending.” She is so much fun. Yesterday we had a MOmmy and Kaylee day. It was really nice. I really enjoyed her company and conversation. We went to lunch, the park and took a walk. She said to me you know how everyone makes their own music naturally-like a cat meows, Bailey’s is the sound of his tounge licking himself. BTW we took Bailey out for today and it was fun. He had a ball and we nackered him out for the rest of the day. Gotta do it more.
William’s bday is coming up. He wants to have a paintball party and a family party and a sleepover party-yeah right. I better start planning.
Jac has a soccer tournament this weekend so that will take most of our time.I would like to go to the beach and have a picnic as well.
Went to the races on Sunday. Man those long days are fun but tiring. Then we went to Red Tracton my new favorite steak house. Huge portions and I feel like a spring chicken with the crowd in there.

I guess that one last day partying at the races did me in. I mean I did an about face the next day. It felt so good-I did everything I was procrastinating about. I paid taxes, late bills, cleaned my house, picked up drycleaning, vitamins, etc etc. I mean I really cleaned my house. I am still working on organzing the house but that will take a while. I even cooked a great meal and made fresh squeezed lemonade. I am only measuring myself against myself.
Last night Kaylee put on sunglasses and made up a rap song. She is hilarious. She stayed home from school because she did not feel well and then wanted to go to park (we did) get icecream (we didn’t) have a playdate (we did). So back to school today.
I got a fricken ticket yesterday for going straight instead of turning left. I guess my cuteness is wearing off. Ha. I had some drama in the morning that was a waste of time. So I made it a good day by being productive.
Jac has a tournament in two weeks. He is so excited.
William has been a lil challenging lately -mainly because he is not sleeping well. Yesterday I took he and Jac to the orth. They almost killed one another in the lobby. I was embarassed. They are wrestling like crazy these days. Ugh. Thank GOd school is back in. Which by the way we are rockin in all ways, on time, homework etc etc.
I am vowing to only drink on weekends and limiting myself to two. If I can’t do this and cleanse for a while then I am going to stop all together. I miss feeling super healthy. A friend told me the other day she stops after two and then she sticks to it and she is managing it much better. Gotta take kids to school. Busy social day. and training with my life coach/trainer.

Kaylee and I are sitting in my bed watching none other than the Disney Channel. I need to buy stock in that company. Eating breakfast and switching between my Facebook and Barbie.com.
She just said to me,”Mommy remember we watched that movie about Amelia Erheart? Well I learned about her the other day and she was the first woman to fly a plane, the first to cross the Atlantic, and she died a tragic death when her plane ran out of gas.” Isn’t that sad? I was very impressed by my little girl. She is growing and changing before my eyes. I said to her “Don’t you love to learn/” and she replied,’OMG yes.”
OUr trip to the races was fun-to fun. By the time we finished Dyane and I were a few sheets to the wind. Then we went downtown, to Michelle’s bday party and Calamity jane tripped at the entrance and they would not let me in. I mean I was very buzzed but would have been fine. So Michelle, as you can see why, was very disapointed in me. I felt terrible and sort of ruined everyone’s night. I have never had that happen ever. I looked at what I could have done different and I should have not gone to the races. I did this last year for my friends bday. The races in the afternoon and then an evening event is to much unless you drink water, and diet red bull. I should have stuck with my no to Dyane and not tried to please everyone.
We got a ticket for not having a license for our dog. Hmm I wonder who called us out? ha.
Anyways off to yoga, gonna hang with the kids then may hit the afternoon races with longtime friend Hadley……..only to be home for dinner and early bed. School night.

Why does the tooth fairy always forget to come.? Well it turns out that she hides the money really well under the bed so we have to find it later. ha ha.
Our family lose their teeth so much that it should be their college fund.
Yesterday Kaylee and I went grocery shopping and then I made the mistake of buying Kaylee her favorite-Barbie gummies (they have some resemblence of fruit). Anyways everytime I succumb to buying them for her, I remember why I should not. She maniuplates and begs to eat one more package. She said that she is such a sugar monster that she can’t control herself. She hints all day-Hmm I am hungry but not for this or that just hmmmm……..something sugary with vitamins in it. Ha ha. NO mas
Conner slept over last night. william and he are planning a business. It is so cute to hear them talk about it daily. I believe they will make it work. Can’t tell you what it is a secret. Some of it is top secret from me because when I walk by his room, he comes out and hugs me…….suspicious behavior. William said his teacher was nicer to him yesterday. One of my heros in the office spoke to her about William. Trying not to get yelled out in parking lot. It is like walking on egg shells, but I can tell they are sensitive to me and how I am trying.
Jac won a soccer ball at Soccer. He is enjoying school, soccer and life as usual.
The other night I went to a wine tasting and I got so many amazing compliments-the one that stuck in my head most was that I get more beautiful every year and today I look beautiful and sexy than ever. Those Italianos……ha.
Taking kids to beach today. Then going to races and finally Michelle’s bday party. Long day …….need to drink diet red bull.

I opted out of going to a fashion show tonight. It is not easy to do that since I have a love affair with fashion. I am embarassed to mention that I am afraid I am missing out tonight. Sort of resembles my highschool days. MY niece katie is in town not to mention that there have been a lot of special occasions and events as well as friend’s in town. I promised my trainer a big change and cut back in my life after the races end. I am ready. Nobody believes me but I am looking forward to it. I have been getting up every morning with my kids and cooking them breakfast as well as making them a nice dinner at night. I will continue to do this as long as they listen to me and clean up after themselves. I have been being stricter and man is it hard but I think I am slightly getting through to them. Praise God. So here I am today in my house and something freaked me out-it was completely silent. It was almost unnerving. ha ha. I need to get more use to that and do more of that-come home and not go do something. I need to real it in and follow a budget. Not fun but I need to teach my kids and also stimulate creativity in all of us.
I saw the movie “Eat, Pray Love,” it was an amazing movie. It had great moments and lines in it. It did run a bit long though. It made me want to conquer my fear and go to Italy. I love Italian people. The movies main message that I got was the difference between Italians and Americans is Italians don’t have to earn relaxation and joy-they just do it and live it.
Last night our family went out to Donovan’s steak house for dinner without kids. It was really fun. We all had a lot of laughs and banters back and forth-although a few things my mother said are resinating in my head and hurt my feelings.
Kaylee is in love with her teacher.SHe made up a song that she has the best teacher in the world! So cute. Wills is having some adjustment with his new teacher. He has had teachers get and adore him and hopefully she will consend to that. I wish I had the patient, understanding teachers that my kids have. I either had teachers hate me or adore me and the ones that hated me, really scarred me.
I am really tired and going to bed early. I need to fill my bucket. I am excited that we are getting to school on time, and we are doing homework after school and following a schedule. Maybe not a schedule for others but for the Cubbison’s. I have not been late either. It feels good.l Now I have to do much more damage control on myself for my children’s sake. I just wish we lived in a world were nobody judges and everyone just saw the good in others. We don’t. William told me he does not want me to wear my exersize clothes to the school. I felt bad that he even had to say that to me. Too bad I am going through what I have been going through and it effecting William or the others in anyway. I truly believe I have crossed the roughest part and everyday is like an epiphany for what I want and don’t want.
I am feeling a little bit of the highschool feelings since school is back in and everyone is getting in their clicks. I frankly feel very overwhelmed at all of the new faces and old faces, keeping up with the school activities, who does what, who’s who’s mom, etc etc etc. It is over stimulation for me. It always takes me a while to get everything down pat in the new school year and still I have questions.
I guess a bunch of the neighbors feel that we are neglecting our dog Bailey. I admit that we dont’ have the energy to control him. He is the most hyper super dog. He gets out constantly and I am sick of it. I need to get the electric fence and get him nutured but both cost a lot of money and I need to be getting some in order to do that. I love him but he is a lot of work that we don’t need. Somehow I pictured having a puppy much different. He also has fleas like every dog in America. We have treated him several times and frankly I don’t know what to do now.
My niece and I have been hanging out. She is fifteen, and somewhat miserable like most teens her age. She told me she can’t wait to go and party with me. Great. No actually she is really cute and I am enjoying our relationship.
So I guess that is it today……exposing myself more…..hopefully connecting or helping another-that is what I aim for. Let’s all be kind, honest, authentic and come from love.

How dorky does that sound. Oh well-it is my blog and I can be as dorky as I want. ha. Anyways I titled my blog that because all of the kids are so happy with their classes and teachers. I did a bad mommy move that left my heart aching. I took Kaylee in to her class and she was so excited. All of her friend’s from the last class were in there. She was jumping for joy. Then we could not find her desk. So I went up to a Mom I know but did not recognize and asked where her teacher was. She pointed to Mr. Verga. I suddenly realized we were in one class down. So I snuck Kaylee and I out of there so nobody would notice. My heart was aching for Kaylee especially when I took her in to the correct class and none of her close friends were in there. She was such a champ and said,”It is okay Mommy.” I think she saw I was so upset for her that she did not want to upset me more. She is so sweet. The good news is that she ended up being in love with her teacher so she does not care. Her teacher is pretty, fashionable,and sweet-all the ingredients for Kaylee to fall in love. Oh and she made them cookies yesterday in the middle of the day-Jackpot!!!!!

Well my son William is taking showers several times a day. I know what is goin to happen right around the corner and I also had a bit of insight late last night. I can’t expose my son during his adolescense-it is not fair to him when it is a difficult time to begin with. I have to monitor a lot I say on my blog now. I have friends that want their privacy. I have people who read it that I don’t want to expose some of my personal struggles, and I want to keep some sense of mystery. ha ha. I tell mostly all then I feel exposed whether via blog or boca. I need to control both. I think about not having a blog someday atleast a public one and there will come a time. The voyerism in me makes me write because I know others are reading which in turn causes me to do it. Then I document my life as well as my children’s life-which i hope will be a gift to both of us someday.
Kaylee took a nap yesterday in the car on drive home. She then said,”I understand how it seems that time stands still when we are asleep but it is really moving forward.” She is so smart. Speaking of smart Wills and Jac both did outstanding on their star testing. I was proud to see that, especially since I am not on them about that.
Kaylee is becoming really independent. She is asking for what she wants and communicating very well. I am very happy to see that. When I was little, I use to fret so much and not say anything. I still am working on that today. Ha. One example of Kaylee doing this is she wanted to bring her carseat in Maica’s car. So before I knew it she was carrying her car seat by herself all the way down the road.
Today after the gym-my mother is taking the boys clothes shopping for school. The kids start school tomorrow. I am happy and sad. Sad that I have to get up at seven to take them to school everyday. I am however vowing to not get on the computer before school and get up and whip everyone in to action and make them some hot breakfasts!

We had a great mini vacation several dollars later. If you could have seen me trying to get three kids packed, out of the house and answer all of their questions and break up their fights-you would have stopped at one. Ha ha. The lil buggers had the nerve to keep asking me if we were staying at a five star hotel or a four star? Did I know that at six? I Doubt it. They were so dissapointed in not going to Tahoe, which by the way we get another opportunity, that nothing compared. Once we arrived they gave our location the thumbs up. Newport is a beautiful, quaint town. Infact I want to buy a house on Balboa Island. I love it. I want a boat and a house on that island or a beach house over looking the ocean in Laguna/newport. Or anywhere for that matter. Is that too much to ask-or dream for???? I have been dreaming about a lot of things lately that I really want-not material things but non tangible things. It feels good.
Kaylee got on her hands and knees this morning and prayed to God to thank him for inventing candy. Uh oh……..Sugar bugs.
After this trip I am going to call Nanny stella , Charlene or Cami in to help me get some order. I want to start out new this year-school year that is. I told William we were going to get organized and on tradition and schedules and he said,”We always say that.” Uhhhh……Dont’ make a situation or mood worse-that is the Cubbison mantra-I believe it. They dont’ listen to that either.
Kaylee is so close to swimming. I am happy for her. She keeps dreaming of it and so do I. She met several friends and although they were twice her size they were her age. I love to watch her interact with friend’s. She told me she is tired of being the littlest and she wants to grow so no we need to eat more than chicken tacos in the fall. Ha ha. That is a summertime, breakfast, lunch and dinner staple at our house.
Today we are going to take a boat out. Jac is afraid of boats. He is having a blast with Brock, Gina’s son. They were in the water for eight hours straight yesterday. we had to shove chicken fingers down their moist mouths in the pool.
The kids and I went in to this candy store that was blessed by God, ha ha. This asian lady was in there and I could tell she was about to blow a gasket due to us. She was following us around, mumbling and then screaming when anyone touched anything. It was quite funny because it was hardly a nice store. Uptight people like that make me laugh.
Oh and yesterday while I was feeling insecure and fishing for a compliment, my friend told me that she can tell that I have been eating a drinking often-because my once rock hard body with a flat stomache has a vino pooch-in the front and in the back. Hmm. Hard to hear especially when I was out feeling cute. ha but she is right. I have not been drinking water at all and eating and drinking anything………but always going to the gym. So today I am up at hotel going to gym, and yesterday I got back on drinking lot’s of water………It is a good thing. I mean on me five pounds fluctuating is a lot. Oh and the kids used all the shampoo so I used soap to wash my hair-not to self and anyone else-never use soap to wash your hair-my hair felt like glue all night…………Not a hot night at all.

Everyday I keep seeing things and hearing things that I want to blog about to entertain and preserve-however I am too busy to blog. I will try my best.
We are leaving for a mini vacation today. Our big vacation came to a hault when I realized they start school this monday rather than the following………Wahoo!!!!!! Did I say that loud? ha.
Actually some days are great others are a nightmare. One thing for sure is I will be happy to have time to get my house organized. I am just ready to throw out tons and give away tons……..no not my clothes. ha. Down girls……
My kids are upset because or vacation keeps downsizing. I mean I am wrong to start big and get them all excited. You would think I could have learned from my childhood always being somewhat dissapointed, due to my expectations and excitment. Not always but often……tone down the dramatic, which I have learned I catch myself doing. It is a step.
Yesterday the kids and I went to the beach/park. It was so beautiful-breezy and sunny. They ran around on the grass, went to the ocean, played in the park. It was a pain in the you know what getting them out of the house. They acted like I was dragging them to prison instead of the beach. It is not fun and by the time we leave Jac and Wills have had four fights at least.
Kaylee asked for another toy and I told her no, and she needs to work for things, clean up her mess, and take care of things. She just said to me that she is going to take my advice and start working for it by running her bath. ha ha. Clever. We went to meet my parents at one of our favorites Su Casa, last night. We had fun. Kaylee was singing to my parents “She wore and itsy bitsy teeny weeny bikini.” She was surprised that my mom knew about it. My mother knows a song for everything. When I was little I would say a word to her and she would sing a song in relation to it. That was our lil game. On the way back Kaylee fell asleep at seven and slept until seven this morning. She was so sleepy at dinner.
My Dad looked so good. I dream about him almost nightly-some good, some not so good. In the particular dream I was vacationing in italy and my mom sent my father there for me to take care of. I had mixed emotions because I wanted to care for him, but it was to hard. I also wanted to enjoy my vacation in Italy. I can read a lot in to that dream. I am always carrying my father in my dreams unless he is miraculously walking and I am crying in joy.
Yesterday when Kaylee was playing with Emma. They were fighting over who was going to water the grass and Kaylee grabbed the bottle. Then she said that she got bad karma and spilled it on her leg. Ha ha. Never a dull moment with my kids especially Kaylee-I mean Chloe. Emma also told us that she is happy we are vacationing a bit because she is tired of us coming over all of the time. Turns out she was just hurt because she is not invited to come with us. However the whole things was cute an understandable.
William has been having some panic issues. He feels scared in his room down the hall and wants to come in my room or Jac’s. Then he feels embarrased about it. He is such a sensitive soul. I need to get him signed up for some things that will keep him mind occupied. He and Conner are starting a cool website and businesss.
Kaylee is so close to swimming solo. I am so excited to be a part of it.
I have been procrastinating on paying bills etc. I really need to get back on top of that and everything. I feel like a chunky monkey who has been on a permanent vacation this summer of eating, drinking and being merry………Soon back to the grind.

Thank God it is Sunday. I love Sundays. I am going to yoga to worship my spiritual GOd. I should be going to church to worship the Normal God.I will return after the kids go back to school. I need it. I am going to return to my old church where I understand the message and it is uplifting.
Our dog got in to a fight or Bailey tried to hump him, with a sausage dog and the owner called our dog a dumb mutt. Ha ha. He is a mutt but we love him.
Last night went to Diane’s bday dinner party. It was really nice. A bunch of her good friends hanging around the fire pit eating, and listening to Duke play his guitar and sing. We all were singing. It was a very nice, intimate moment.
Gotta go to yoga……..try and blog later.