Sunny morning……

by Amy Cubbison on April 19th, 2009

It is a beautiful sunny morning. I was sitting on the swing drinking my coffee and enjoying it until it got to hot. I am making my way to the gym, then taking the kids to the beach for a bit. Later we are going to visit the Ham’s. I am looking forward to seeing and chatting with Melanie. Feeling a bit sensitive today.

Friday night I was out for a bit and had fun for while, on the way up but then the tears were flowing. We are having some home issues that we need to deal with. It is honest but scary. I want to always be a person of character and am often afraid of hurting someone or saying something which make me act of our character. Then that way i contradict myself of don’t live the way I want to. Anyways life is not easy, as Miley sings and say’s,”Life is a climb.” Although she is super young with her entire world in front of her. I want to address all my issues and fill my void with God, peace, self awareness and contentness.
Last night we went to Dyane and Chris’s for their annual Easter egg, Greek festival. It was nice. The kids had a blast. They all performed a little show for us and it was beyong adorable. During the day, Kaylee and I met my brother after the gym, at Rimel’s. You know I go to the restaurant often when they hear my voice and know who it is. They treat me really nice there. I could just sit there all day and talk and meet new people. When Kaylee and I were in the desert. I was sitting in the bar waiting for everyone. I had just had a martini and I was coloring with Kaylee. That is fun to color after a martini. You get all sort of creativity flowing. LOL. ANyways this proper snobby jewish couple was next to me. I found myself talking to him and I knew I was bothering him but I could not stop. I just wanted to get his approval for some God forsaking reason. One of my issues to deal with. Then when they left, I was like thinking in my head,”YOu big snobby jerk, who wants your approval, you are no better than anyone else and everyone is GOd’s child!!” Big fat Jerk!! The last time I felt like that was when I was in La in the lobby and trying to talk to these four super snobby gay guys. I could tell I was bothering them but I just could not help doing the act. I want to win them over. The good news is I dont’ take it as personally as I use to. I think most people like me, and people who get me, get me but there are two types of people that don’t and they are very mind over matter, type A people, and Snobby judgemental people. I do not like judgemental people. I beat to my own drum and don’t follow all of the”rules.”
Going to run now, come back later with some amusing stories and thought!

From my-life

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