Ouch

by Amy Cubbison on October 24th, 2011

Hurting a bit over the necessary end of a friendship but it still hurts. I saw a quote that read,” I have the privilege to say goodbye to someone I have known for a short time but am sad to say goodbye to .” It sort of went like that…haha but you get the jists……..Seasons, reasons and lifetimes……The truth is I have been getting side tracked again and rearranging my priorities and that is not a good thing…I hate when I do that. Regret is not fun, especially when it entails children’s lives………….So today was a day of progress for me. I made a lot of dreaded calls. I then cleaned the downstairs and started organizing my closet. All the while getting that familiar feeling of hedonism and shame, that I have spent so much money on clothes and crap. It literally makes me feel sick. I am learning the lessons of money really hard now, so as i say, it is a good thing but not a fun thing….I see how I have run to people, places and things to not feel sometimes……….I need to be careful because I like to run away from things. ha……………..I missed my babies last night but right now we are all snuggling in bed watching Fineus and Pherb. Then we are going to get Gluten free pizza………It was so cold today but i am loving it. As long as the sun shine is shining. Getting excited for my bday celebration and to surpass the year of my horrible accident and horrible year…………….Aside from watching news and politics more-I want to watch documentries. to learn and keep my brain and mind active. So when Kimberly and kids came over today, She and I watched one, while the kids played, or should I say destroyed the house. ha. jk. Anyways not sure why I picked this topic of Assisted Dying legally in Oregon, but I did. It was soooooo heart wrenching and sad but interesting. I only watched half of it but it evoked so many emotions…….what a shocker. ha ha……….Anyways, it just makes me appreciate the simple things and realize all we have is our health and life, and then there is the other side that nobody is certain about. It always reminds me to go back to church and strengthen my faith again……because how could this huge wonderful world all be a mistake??

From my-life

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