by Amy Cubbison on April 29th, 2013

I am such a proud Mama. I am babysitting Phillip and Mathew with Kaylee and Jac. They are so cute. Mathew was very upset when Peter and Marcellite left. I comforted him for a few minutes then Kaylee and Jac completely distracted him. …….I was pmsing very much this weekend. I was grumpier than usual so much so that many noticed. I do not get like that often but I can tell you this much-it was not fun. The after math and remorse for some of my cheeky comments and thoughts did not feel good. I can’t imagine how regularly grumpy people feel after they do or say say something they should not. …Or maybe they do not feel remorse. Anyways it goes back to the people that feel good and speak highly of others feel good on the inside as well…..We had a nice weekend despite my pms. Hung out mostly with the kids at Dyane’s. I procrastinated on doing things around my house, and finally did a few very minor things. When I feel bad the last thing I want to do is housework. ….I am looking forward to this week. My friend Cindy is coming in to town, as well as family members. We are having a dual baptism this weekend. My mother is keeping my father at the same home, which makes me calmer………I was taking this Cacoa root, which is derived from Cocoa/Chocolate. It gave me a lot of energy but along with that I think that contributed to me being a lil anxious and grumpy. Everything has a side effect. Other than that I like the mixture of vitamins and supplements I am taking. I find the raw Coconut butter very beneficial. .The best news all weekend was I got a much needed massage. Ivy worked in to my hips and booty so much that I was shouting out with pain. It hurt but felt good at the same time. All I know is the next day I felt such a relief as for the first time in a long time I did not have pain…….I took Sofia and Emma to get pedicures the other day. I had promised them and it has been long overdue . I always try and strive to do what I say even if it is belated……..I ran in to a woman I know from mutual friends. She thanked me on my blog and my Facebook posts. She said that I really touched her, and several of her other friends. It was nice to hear, I have not heard that in a while…..My friend Amy is doing this therapy technique called MDR. I use to that when I was younger. It is a tapping that helps you get rid of stuck memories that harbor your happiness. I found it very helpful although I shed a lot of tears. It was mainly about how badly I feel for my father these days. It also was helping to remember how alone I felt as a child and perhaps that is why I love to be around others so much……….Went to traffic court today after getting lost in the hood. I was so nervous as I have never been there (not that I don[t get tickets, I just use to pay them) anyways I walked in and lo and behold, I knew two people out of thirty and they were seated next to one another . Ha ha. We all had a laugh and it made the entire experience funny!! The other funny part was that when i put my purse through security, the woman reminded me I had a swiss army knife. Ha ha. Thank God she was nice and trusted me. I told her I got that for a gift and completely forgot about it and never used it. After all it was bright pink……ha ha. Lucky I have an honest face…..There were quite a few characters in there but fun people watching….and once again so thankful I NEVER got a tattoo…………………Another ironic and funny story was at Dyane’s party last weekend. I met a girl who works with Dr. Mundes who did my back surgeries…….I am not sure if you remember but I fell for the Nightengale complex with him. He was so kind, nice and had great bed side manor. Mix all that charisma and the drugs and I was claiming I was loved him. I have sort of a history with this in the past with many surgeons/doctors. The difference with him was when i was sober I still really respected him. I remember I was crying my eyes out on Mother’ day when I found out I needed another surgery and he had sooooo much compassion in his eyes. Another joke/story was that when I was under anesthesia, I asked him if I should get a tramp stamp on my scar. He did not know what that was, so I explained in detail to him….Later to find he was a true Mormon. ha ha…oh well.leaving my mark again for better or worse……
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