cockadoodledoo

by Amy Cubbison on January 29th, 2008

“Our rooster does not wake us up but he cockadoodledoos at lunchtime. It is a riot. ONce again I had too many shots of expresso and I am feeling anxious. Molly my dog, is driving me nuts. She barks all of the time at me. She wants to eat all day long-I swear she is senile and forgets that she just ate. As if I need someone else to be barking orders at me.?? …………The therapist is helping me so much. I love her. I feel myself getting stronger and clearer. I love feeling as if I am working on myself and evolving. She tells me once you love yourself you will worry much less and just be. I did a lot of crying about my father yesterday. She had me talk to him and it felt good to get out some of the things I want to say but am afraid to say……….I feel like lately since I am feeling lonely I am always checking my emails, and messages. I want to be wanted. It is a bit ocd but I will get through that as well. ………….Kaylee told me she had a dream or a nightmare I should say where a chicken was pecking at her teeny, tiny, little fingers. Exact words. You can tell she mimicks what she hears me saying. She does have the tiniest, cutest little fingers. She keeps coming in our room in the middle of the night. I love it but Neil hates it. She has been whining so much and I hate it. It seems most of my friends with three year olders are doing that. ………….the maid came today-yippee! I have to go to the grocery store AGAIN. We are out of cereal and milk -the two most important staples. My boys are eating us out of house and home these days. Last night Hilton and Chandra came over for a drink. They are such a nice couple and ofcourse Kaylee loves to play with their little girls. Then the Ham’s came over for dinner. I made nachos for the first time and they turned out pretty good. The kids liked them so that is a new idea for a family dinner…………I taped the Guiniess Book of world records for Wills. I remembered seeing that when I was little and being grossed out by the lady with long, twisted finger nails. He is watching it right now and keeps running down to tell me about it. By the way he said his stomach hurt today-NOt! He seems fine to me…………..Kaylee had ballet and tap. SHe is learning a bit of hip hop. Melanie said Kendra told her that she thinks babies are gross-they burp, throw up, pee and poop. She said when she has a baby she is going to hand it right over to her husband. Way to go Kendra. Kaylee keeps asking me questions about having babies and she is scared. I said to her that she has a long time to not think about that……………….Tonight I am having dinner with my mother. There is a lot I want to talk to her about. I feel a bit hormonal lately. Sometimes when my kids climb all over me I feel as if I am going to lose it. It is a bad feeling like being suffocated. ………I am feeling a bit better today so hopefully that bug is gone. I am going to take a nap with Kaylee before I pick up Jac and all the chaos begins all over again.”

From my-life

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