Diary of a housewife etc. etc. etc

by Amy Cubbison on December 30th, 2009

Feeling super witty today. I have laughed so much today and have only been awake for one and a half hours. My life is rarely boring,which can be good and occasionally not so. I spoke with Hadley, my longtime La JOlla high friend. We just get eachother and appreciate one another. I was telling her some of my stories and she is the best audience. I was telling her that really young woman don’t threaten me because I think as woman age they get more beautiful as well as more interesting. On this particular day when not feeling so hot, I was at my fav place, Rimels in cardiff, and this forty something guy was sitting with this young hot thing of perfection. Nails, clothes, makeup, hair, body and she even seemed interesting. I could not stop staring at her, and it for sure put a damper on my day. ha ha. How is that honesty for ya? I have been having feelings of jealousy lately, a bit, and that is not norm for me. I don’t like it and I feel out of control. “And this to shall pass.”
My sister clarified to me that my Dad’s sister will still be living with their other sister. This made me feel so much better, that nobody is alone.
Kaylee has been snuggling me all night. Love when they are super cuddly. Jac even came up to me and gave me a great big hug for no reason. It felt awesome. I told my therapist (going to help me with my journey of responsibility growing up and being a better mother) that love to nurture, and take care of people except when they do not appreciate it ie: kids etc. That is the toughest thing about kids. My therapist was telling me how to get order and my kids to help me more. All the while he was talking, I kept thinking in my head,”There is no way to do this without numbing myself and or taking a sedative.” They don’t listen and then I lose it. Speaking of losing it, Last week when I was not feeling well in all ways, I had no patience for anyone. Infact I was down right not nice to others mostly strangers. I yelled at lady at McDonalds, and then when I asked directions from people, I got very frustrated and loud when they were not helpful. OMG. this is not me, and now I know how most of the country feels, I even honked at peops. I was mean for three days and now I feel bad, but hey it was tasting a part of life, I have not visited much. Sorry to everyone who crossed my path!!

From my-life

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