Merry Christmas!!!!

by Amy Cubbison on December 25th, 2009

Merry Christmas to all of my friends, family and soon to be friends, out there. Ha get it? Anyways the social butterfly’s wings have been clipped and they are not moving. I did it backwards or is everyone so tired like this when the holidays finally come. I keep thinking this is what someone feels like who works fulltime, and has kids and a life. I frigen get it……….anyways I am still in pj’s. Kids woke up and rummaged through all of their forty gifts only to keep lookin for more. William is the only one who is utterly pleased this Christmas. I can’t help but to feel as if I failed. I want to knock the socks off of them, and I rarely can. I think because they get to much daily to begin with. A Norman Rockwell painting it is not. I get so irritated by the way they complain, compare, and then rip apart stuff and throw the trash on the floor. I know this is my own doing but it is tough to stop cycles. I have that feeling that I need to take Kaylee and Jac tomorrow to get them something that Santa forgot. I keep forgetting using the word Santa and saying the wrong thing anyways. Atleast I can still blame Santa. Hmmm…. Bad Santa! INfact Bad Santa was so bad this year that the main thing Kaylee wanted on her list was a hairsalon and Santa forget to update the credit card and they never shipped that or several other things. i feel so bad. I feel so bad that I feel that I need to go to get Kaylee a Barbie electric convertible car or something. Same thing happened last year. Although I really don’t expect much at Christmas except from my Mama, the kids got me grandma pj’s and slippers. I was like,’Hey These are to old for Benjamin Button.” Maybe they are for Nana in England, all I know is I hope my mom has a good gift for me. Joking sort of, and yes I was hard to please as a child. I remember two off the chart amazing Christmass so clear and no others quite compared. Still it is best to be an optimist, and get dissapointed sometimes. I had breakfast with the kids then fell back asleep on my new cozy, blanket that I love. I just hope the kids don’t get chocolate on that as they do everything else. I am also feelng a bit defeated in my job to keep my home nice and clean. Things are breaking and I can’t keep it clean as I like. I am overwhelmed. I want to move in to a hotel.!! Boy I am complaining just like my kids this Christmas. Okay a couple more than I will change my tune. This is how tired I am, I am not even excited about getting dressed up and looking cute for a holiday celebration? Crazy?? I really am missing Molly my dog. My friend Tracy’s dog was hit by a car, and I saw her pain and it rekindled mine for Molly-all except her family surprised her with a sweet bulldog puppy. I am trying to not make it about me but I have been craving and missing a puppy, in between my moments of being overhwhelmed with keeping up with the three kids I have already. Ha. Want to snuggle with a puppy at night. Also a good friend of mine found out her ex has liver cancer, and my heart is bleeding for them. I am trying to separate myself but now I am worried about me and everyone I know getting cancer. Hmm. Maybe I should get up and get out to stop my mind wandering. Finally my last sad part-I watched,”My sister’s keeper,” and why oh why did I do that? It was so sad, and I am so choked up that I still have a lump in my throat? ………………So after I get myself up and dressed as cute as I can do it today, we are going to La JOlla to see my parents, and my sister and family in town. I am looking very forward to that, and I am sure it will bring me back to gratitude. Oh one more last night we took the kids to a nice restaurant and as reminded of how that is not the best idea. I get stresed out at all of their bad manners. French finishing school here we come. Church was good, and the fake snow and it seems that God remembers me still. Happy Holidays!!!

From my-life

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